AUTISM & DAYLIGHTMARES

Hullo, got a sore throat today.
just a few random thoughts.

THE ACTOR'S NIGHTMARE
this is fairly common among actors, they wake up onstage (sometimes even naked) where a play is in progress where everyone else knows their role and their lines. i think this is an excellent definition of High Functioning Autism (Aspergers Syndrome-see note on Ill Lil in prior blog) like my bipolar son has. geeks & nerds are savvy about machines but clueless about humans,like that only worse.my youngest son is ODD, wicked smart but not a typical PC game addicted youth.he has Issues (don't we all ?).
imagine yourself in a foreign land,say France where the natives are rude and condescending to you, you're ET and you can't phone home.at it's worse i'm not sure Autistic kids even know what being human is all about (men use that excuse with women A LOT.)

MY REVERSE WEREWOLF GF
on a related tangent,
when i was in SF Stae getting my futile Psych degree i met two women in a psych class who were attracted to me.
one was severely bipolar and had spent five years locked in her room,having food slid under her door like in prison (her parents were both wealthy and very patient apparently) because her best friend's brother had broken her heart.one day,five years later, her father happened to mention he needs something sent to San Francisco and she suprised everyone by volunteering to go.seems her BFF was in SF and unknown to her,so was the brother.
the other was prettier but ODD as Hell,i found out more later.rumor had her being a dark witch and one of my favorite teachers hated her with a passion.
(sigh)
it all came down to a cat and my being finicky.
i visited the bipolar girl at her home for one of my classes (Psych classes are the best place to find and test or quiz 'crazy people' who ususally study this crap in self defense) and she tongue kissed her cat!
now I LOVE CATS and over the years have had or been involved with over a dozen of the aloof darlings but I NEVER KISS A CAT WITH MY MOUTH OPEN! NEVER EVER.
so on to the pretty one who turned out to be an INCEST SURVIVOR AND HIGH FUNCTIONING SCHIZOPHRENIC.
she went to school, had a job and a car and eventually a place of her own.
i read up on Incest and Schizophrenia, one good thing about Schizophrenia is that when you find out their core beliefs everything else follows more or less logically.my future girlfriend believed that she was a Reverse Werewolf with fur on the inside (checked a few places intently and found none).she also had a seven foot tall Invisible werewolf familiar (like Jimmy Stewart in the movie Harvey).like me she was a fan of horror movies and horror fiction,unlike me it became her gospel and yes she was a dark witch (self taught) and a proud card carrying member of the Church of Satan ( no biggie,i'd read the books among others).
on full moons she liked to run around naked in a local park with a knife in her teeth to encourage fur sprouting, no doubt this gave the Police helicopters a thrill.no idea what the park homeless population thot of her antics.she was a nice girl within her limits. the other girl crashed and burned after renewing the relationship with her BFF's brother.me and wolf girl had a multi year frustrating semi relationship and later she even invited me and my first wife to her wedding....very Freudian!

WHAT ME NORMAL?
what was the point of all this?
Mental Wellness?
Who decides who is Normal anyway?
oh that was it.
i took a Psycholgoical Testing class at SF State(required) with a puckish and sweet professor who knew my GF but didn't hate her.for my final exam i tested her,bipolar girl and a Pinoy neighbor as well as myself.the Pinoy woman was FOB (Fresh Off da Boat) and psychic, she talked to the dead among other things (no lie, this is rather common in some cultures). the person declared most Normal and Boring, by all three tests, was ME!
i was offended. I AM NOT NORMAL!
look at what I've just written,does that seem Normal to you? i haven't even mentioned sociopaths and serial killers have i?
(sigh)
if you have seen Lily Tomlin LIVE you may have second thots about sanity, what if people like my young son,the Pinoy woman and XGF werewolf are right?
what if we live in a Consensus Reality where we chose to IGNORE most things??? (watch Fringe on Fox or old X Files episodes)
now when on LSD or peyote....

ah but that is another tale.
namaste
mega
P.S. in other news,
check out the Blog Lists on the right for Referrals and Resources and some damn good writing to boot.