Tuesday, August 3, 2010

NEKKID TALES

"THE BELIEVER IS HAPPY,THE DOUBTER IS WISE." Hungarian Proverb, ah the story of my life.

Aloha, it's me again.
yes i am writing more often because my energy levels are slowly rising, due to the iron supplements maybe?

NO BP BLOG

i was going to write a blog about BP:THE BIG LIE about the meme (memory byte/mindworm) being spread like toxic oil by the MSM . WE DON'T SEE ANY OIL THEREFORE THE SPILL MUST NOT BE AS BAD AS WE THOT. ALL U SHEEPLE GO BACK TO SLEEP.
Hullo, dispersants?
emulsify the crude oil, so that the surface tension is broken and it falls as droplets to the seabed.another side effect is the emulsifiers make the crude too thin for skimmers to salvage, so the out of work fishermen/skimmers are laid off.all this is BRILLIANTLY EVIL as it will decrease probable damages while poisoning public perception if this fiasco ever goes to trial in maybe a decade or so.( see EXXON VALDEZ) HUGE SIGH.
but that was too depressing...

NO GUV BLOG
thot about blogging about billionaire BUY ME THAT! Meg Witless vs. Jerry da Bum but that was even worse.

GETTING NEKKID
so i was surfing nudists sites sunday and i recalled a few mildly amusing stories, here we go;

late 70s
LIMONTOUR (sp?) is one of the many semi official nude beaches on the PT,REYES SEASHORE, the park rangers are cool with nudity.so we decided to double date picnic one weekend.me and Wolf Girl, Kim and her beau Vart.so we drive there in one car and walk the quarter mile or so beyond the textile beach ( clothed) and of course i am naked ASAP.
WOW, YOU HAVE THE BIGGEST BALLS I HAVE EVER SEEN! proclaims the startled and sheltered Kim.
trying not to be too defensive,as they are a bit pendulous, i comment that she had not see many beyond Vart, her father and lil brother which she admitted was true.
BTW
Vart was my next door nabe and fellow cabbie, on one visit Kim had come out of the bathroom naked into the studio apartment living room unawares.she YIKED and fled back for a towel.years later she would tell me she loved me because i had seen her naked and still wanted to be her friend!(
self esteem much?)
so anyway i'm naked and Wolf Girl is down to one thin layer of clothing waiting for it to warm up more. we had some fruit and stuff which needed cutting and nobody had a knife except me (i AM black after all).
i had a brand new knife, small but fierce.
BE CAREFUL IT'S VERY SHARP! i caution, as Wolf Girl cuts herself then sucks hungrily on her own blood, (which i also did when i purchased it as a test of sharpness OW!.

I WARNED YOU i say as Vart then cuts himself...then Kim attempts to cut some melon and gouges a deep hole in her thumb (trained as a concert pianist remember?)
OH VART! she wails as the blood drains from her face and dark red blood snails down her wrist....we got to see the ER at Marin General while Kim got snitches and we all took a rain check on Fun.

early 90s
one of my fave nude beaches is MUIR BEACH, just before STIMSON BEACH on highway one, unlike most nude hangouts you don't have toi be part mountain goat to get down a poison ivy draped trail ( like a tiny beach on one just before Muir.so anyway SOUL MATE and i took the boyz to Muir,despite the fact it was the site of my wedding to MY EX-THE MIRAGE. they weren't bothered by nudity being my sons and having seen naked people all their young loves.now SOUL MATE IS DEATHLY AFRAID OF DOGS having been bitten as a child and there was an unleashed dalmation roaming the beach that day, his name was Farley.we sat as far away from the dog as possible and began to eat our lunch. i think it was my oldest Z BOY who first provoked the dogs interest, the dog decided to take his sandwich- Z Boy stood up and the dog nearly toppled him in pursuit of sandwich, SOUL MATE reached down deep in her core and grabbed the sandwich and held it high above the dogs reach-so it bit her.

someone pointed out to us the dogs owner and that it had also bitten someone last week there, SIGH so it was back to Marin General for a tetanus shot and rabies check.we filed a police report et al.luckily Farley was rabies free.

early 70s
the GOODMAN BLDG IS GONE. it was torn down for some modernistic in ugly around the bicentennial 1976. it was built as a multi story boarding house & IWWW (Wobblies HQ) i guess in the 40s and was a maze of dark hallways and unlit stairs,it was not Safe...but it was CHEAP so a colony of artists of all stripes had blossomed there and were attempting to buy it as a co-op.so they had a fund raising Potluck and i was invited by a co worker who lived there.i brought wine and some cheeses and was looking at the artwork on display and talking to moderately fascinating people when i noticed someone who was Not talking to anyone.
white female,twenties, short brown hair, a lil chubby but not obese and she was totally naked from her head to her painted toenails.so i got some punch and sat next to her
ARE YOU AN ARTISTS MODEL? i asked, since nude were their working clothes and i had been to Life Drawing nite classes with nude models of both sexes in The Haight and at Mission High.
NO she answered.
ARE YOU A PERFORMANCE ARTIST? i asked, testing a phrase new to me.
NO,I'M JUST NAKED.
OKAY,I'LL BITE.WHY? she then explained that she worked on Broadway at one of the clubs where barkers yelled NAKED NAKED NAKED at the top of their lungs, i know cuz i lived in hotels above them.so horny guys came in to talk to her,naked and behind glass, and her job was to coax cash out of them by alluding to having wild anything goes sex in the backroom then when they were tapped out a huge bouncer or three gave them the bums rush to the cold concrete outside.
i asked if she felt guilty about cheating those guys and she said no, she had no real opinion one way or another.

you know how in every poll there is an UNDECIDED or NOT SURE element?
HULLO SIR OR MADAM, WOULD YOU MIND IF WE STUCK THIS TEN INCH KNITTING NEEDLE IN YOUR LEFT EYE? she would be one of those, just another sheeple bleating in the frigid nite.
anyway naked or not i moved on to more interesting conversations.

my first nude beach 1971
my first real girl friend bought a station wagon for $100 and said we were going to the beach, i replied that i did not have a suit and she replied YOU DON'T NEED ONE.IT'S A NUDE BEACH. oh?!pretty sure we went to Muir but i didn't know Marin at all in those days, having been in frisco less than six months total.
BTW
most men i have mentioned nude beaches to shy away like i'm talking about needles. they are afraid they'll get a BONER ON THE BEACH and be embarrassed,
i tell them IF IT HAPPENS IT HAPPENS, TAKE A TOWEL AND BOOK SO...i did not get a boner on the beach and had a great time peep watching. my first GF who was six feet tall, attracted almost as much attention as i did-being the only black on the beach. a nice german lady in her 70s even asked me about it later that afternoon.
BTW i have noticed the diff in peeps when they lounge around naked and when they armor-up in their clothing, it's fascinating and so sad. HUGE HUGE SIGH.

i have more tales but i haveta go make peace between feuding faction of one of the county commissions i am on.imagine that if u will, me playing Peacemaker.i'm usually the one starting the sh*tstorm NOT quelling it. SIGH.

MINISTRY OF NUDITY & NEKKIDNESS
namaste y'all
meag

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